The year 2014 has to be one of the most eventful years I can recall. Last December I turned 50 and had the best birthday ever. I should have known that was just another day in my crazy world. I'm almost positive the heads of my friends are spinning if they have been anywhere near me this year.
It was going to be interesting and we knew that. What we didn't foresee is HOW interesting. Some of those things could have been left out but then again, it just wouldn't have been the same.
We began the year with umpiring. Hunter took off for his first away from mom experience. Most boys start out going off for their freshman year in college. Not my son. He takes off to Daytona Beach, Florida following a dream. I have to confess that we also encouraged this dream as we have any dream that may arise in our home. I am a true believer in following the desires of your heart because they are there for a reason. You have to choose sometimes between right and wrong but if you always choose the right path you can't go wrong. He had a great six week run with some of the top umpires our country has to offer. He attended the Harry Wendlestedt Umpire School and Harry's son Hunter runs this school. Hunter W. saw his dream become reality this year when he umpired his first World Series. What an example that was in front of my Hunter to dream big.
Unfortunately, age and experience weren't in Hunter's favor this year and they recommended he attend another clinic in Cocoa Beach and then another in Louisiana. He was chosen then to umpire in The Prospect League. Twenty thousand miles later he realized they make no money and are very tired at the end of the season. Come April he will realize they didn't take taxes out and the government will want their money. It hasn't squashed his dream and we are prepared to teach him, anything worth having is worth working hard, putting forth your best effort and polishing up your star to shine.
Another crazy thing in our lives is I still work two jobs. I have the pleasure of working at Academic Urology with some fantastic people in addition to entering my 27th year at Erlanger. I have learned a lot. I've seen some things that would make even the smartest person scratch their head. I have enjoyed every day even when we are busting our humps and having one of "those" days. My girlfriend there likes to say we are like "pees and carrots". Yes, you are reading it right....it is a urology office so yes, I am PEES. Vanessa for some reason wanted to be carrots. We really do get along that well. It is nice.
Many of you have been so dedicated to being a warrior of prayer. It has not gone unnoticed this year. I almost lost my best friend and we truly believe that without the prayers of our friends she would not be with us today.
Kim went in for a routine gastric bypass. Really, nothing is routine, but for those of us in the medical field it is routine. I was there with her family waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting and I began to feel as if something was wrong. We had not had an update in awhile and while yes, she was a big girl I also knew he had been in there long enough. Dr Sanborn finally came out and talked to us. Kimmie was a train wreck inside with a lot of scar tissue that he had to cut away. I was with her every chance I could be even with two jobs. I would not have been anywhere else. One night she kept telling me how bad it hurt and how she wasn't going to be able to walk this road. Having been there, done that, I knew she could. She is one of the strongest women I know. I had her up to the bathroom and nursing her as I know she would me.
I sent her family home and promised her if she would go to sleep I would go home and rest too. She dosed off, as promised, I left. It wasn't two hours later I receive a call from her daughter. They were taking her to emergency surgery. She was septic and it was not looking good. Thank God for the quick thinking of the doc for calling for a stat CT.
Several hours later, another call... touch and go. Her labs are bad. She is out of surgery and on a vent. They had to leave her abdomen open. My heart was breaking. Again, I was with her as much as I could be between the job and visiting hours. I have a wonderful boss who let me take off and see her at lunch. My heart was breaking. I couldn't lose my best friend like this! I wasn't going to lose her! I was going to fight when she couldn't. I was going to champion her cause when she felt she wanted to give up. Her husband had given up. She had given up. Her daughters didn't want to give up but had lost hope. I REFUSED! Days turned into weeks on a ventilator. Little at a time we started to get some response. One night her daughter sang her favorite song. We played Casting Crowns on her iPad. We prayed over her. She even had a skpe with Taylor even though she was on a vent. She tried to talk around it telling Taylor she would not miss her wedding.
She didn't! She pulled through and praised Jesus the whole time! She and her family are now in church. Her daughter Jessica has turned her life completely around and is now following Christ. When we are walking by faith there is ALWAYS something we can't see. Now, on this side of Kimmie's ordeal we see.
During all this crazy stuff with jobs, sickness, and ball stuff we intermingled lace and flowers. It was wedding season at our house. It look like a bridal shop threw up in our dining room. There were showers to attend, dress fittings to schedule, final decisions to be made. It was fun to watch my thrifty daughter stick to her budget and remember..."at the end of the day, whether you spent $100 or $10,000 you are still just as married". This was what I reminded her every time we hit a hard money decision. They are so happy and in love. The wedding was beautiful and the weather perfect. And for those who asked the question.... yes, I did cry.
Hunter left the very next morning for his excursion. It was a week that changed our entire family forever. We had a wedding, one fly the coop and then a death all within a week. Death and dying have been a part of my family as long as I can remember but this wasn't something anyone was prepared for. My niece OD'd and they couldn't pull her out no matter how hard they tried. Imagine having your heart ripped in to a thousand little pieces. My son has just left and is more than 8 hours away. My daughter is in a foreign country on a honeymoon. My brother has just lost his oldest daughter and my parents have lost a child they raised for several years. As good as I am at my job, as cold as some people think I am, this was one of the tough ones.
In the age of computers and instant knowledge of anything happening in the world it is very difficult to keep things hidden until you can reach out to your children. Having to tell my son on the phone that one of his favorite cousins was dead and he couldn't come be with the family would tear out the heart of the coldest person. Picking your daughter up at the airport from celebrating the biggest step in her life, only to be met with that news, is overwhelming to say the least. Neither of my children got to say good bye. Fortunately, they aren't the little children I sometimes wish they were anymore and they know that one day they will get to see her again.
Mark began a second job at Averitt Express. While I wouldn't recommend second jobs for everyone in the family it seems to be working for us. We are tired but slowly and surely we are getting out of debt and hopefully will be looking at getting me a new car soon. I am a strong supporter of Nissan and with 284,000 miles my pathfinder is still rolling along. Of course, Scott Womack has kept it rolling for me at times and for that I am grateful!
Sundays are filled with church and rents. I seem to have taken over the Sunday dinner duties at my mom and dad's house. I enjoy cooking. Always have...it is the cleaning that gets me. It is nice to get to spend this day with my parents as I become increasingly aware that time is not on my side anymore. I'm thankful to have been raised by acts of service parents for I feel I'm fulfilling my purpose while I am there. Doctor's appointments and just babysitting Daddy sometimes is a full time job for anyone. I'm glad I have my sister that takes the majority of the craziness that is the sandwich generation. Luckily she hasn't jumped off into the deep end and drowned yet.
We did take them to Florida on vacation. You haven't lived until you take your 81 year old parents to the beach. Especially my parents! They have to live by my sister, Teresa's rules. Those rules are simple, "no cussing, no fussing, no spitting, no hitting, no biting, no fighting". Simple right? If you know my daddy those rules aren't so easy some days!
It made me tear up when I watched my daddy for the first time in 40 years, in my presence, walk on the beach. He just walked down to the water and that was about as far as he could go. All of a sudden, I saw my granddaddy. He was giggling like my granddaddy. He was being silly like my granddaddy. And my mom.....lol....what does she do but shake her head and say "silly old man!"
Football season came and went so fast that I'm not sure it really happened. It was our last year at Jacksonville State University but not the end of our supporting those gamecocks! They did us proud and as usual the Marching Southerners were superb. Then I blinked.
That was the wrong thing to do....blink. Somewhere in that span of time my daughter became my friend. She became a wife and confidant. She got smart. She got funnIER. She matured. She was set to graduate! While this was always the plan we never think the end of those four years will ever get here. They do and they did. Last week I watched with pride as my daughter walked across the stage, shook hands with Dr Meehan and received her degree. He declared them alumni of Jacksonville State University and my heart swelled with pride. She did it! We did it! She has so much life experience under her belt there is nothing that she can encounter that she can not conquer.
Christmas has now come and gone. Hunter will be heading out again soon. Taylor has now officially left the nest. The tears haven't started yet but I did have to laugh as she left last Sunday. As Taylor gave me one last hug before she left, my mother told her "go on now before you or your mama starts crying!" My daughter in all of her infinite wisdom says "We all good granny (that college education really paid off huh?) She ain't gonna cry today. It may be next week or maybe next month but it won't be today. She will be standing at the sink one day and will start baaaaawwwwwwwling because she misses me." With a laugh and a smile out the door she went to start her life as Casey Whitson's wife, Marine wife, my adult daughter, college graduate, and closet comedian.
In three days, I will celebrate my fourth year as fat free. Ok, maybe not fat free, but less of me. I am gaining. It's ok, you aren't the only one that has noticed. I know those of us who have had surgery are watched, talked about and heads shake saying "she's gained some don't you think?" The reasons we were fat have not magically gone away. We will always struggle with it. It is in our genetic makeup. One can quit drugs. One can quit alcohol. One can quit smoking, but one can not quit eating. It is physically impossible. Those emotional days that are food comfort days have reared their ugly head. Those days where you would chew somebody's arm off for a piece of chocolate still remain. I have still not had a coca cola since December 18, 2010. I will NEVER eat another Krystal. I will be starving before I eat another McDonalds hamburger. With those things right there I feel my surgery was a success. I have the tools at my disposal. If I don't use them it is my fault. Being a loser is a great feeling. Being a successful loser is an amazing feeling.
In between all these wonderful, crazy, sad days, was life. You know the kind where you are flying by the seat of your pants. The days where you feel like it is groundhog day over and over like the movie. The mornings you feel like the Dunkin Donuts man getting up to make the donuts. The problem with those days, they fly by while you aren't paying attention. You look up, your children are grown. You have gray hair. You have aches and pains that you never thought you would have until you were "OLD". Old sneaked in while I wasn't looking. The good thing about that is all my facebook friends are the same age.
When I look in the mirror and don't recognize that girl, I am reminded that my friends still see ME. When I feel like I am the fattest thing on the planet, my friends see a little petite girl. When I am down and out and feeling low, my friends and patients put a smile on my face. When I want something to eat or drink, when I want/need something new to wear, when I am available to help another person, I am blessed for I have great friends. I have friends and family that love me for me. I can go get something to eat or drink. I can find something, somewhere to wear. I can ALWAYS help someone along the way. Yes, I am blessed.
