It has been ALMOST one year!

     I can't believe it has been almost a year since I imparted some wisdom to my family and friends. I know many of you have given up on me while others are awaiting these words with baited breath!

     I've come to realize that some people are just plain weird. Now, before someone says "duh" let me explain. I am usually quick to respond to this question with something silly BUT my face sometimes gives me away.

      I can't understand how some people SERIOUSLY ask "were you born in the south?" I AM SERIOUS! THEY REALLY DO!! Any of you that know me and have spoken to me, can "hear" where I originated. I have several responses. My favorite go to is "what gave it away?" I need to have some more responses to this silly question that I can pull from. I have used the "born in south Alabama", "born in south Detroit", "born in South Dakota". Yesterday I asked the older gentleman, who clearly was NOT born in the south "what gave it away? My brown hair?" We shared a laughed and moved on. He was quite a jovial fella so I didn't much mind it but some are 100% serious. Not a pulling your leg kinda question from some. Usually it is men and I often wonder if they have ever traveled outside of the south to know there is a different sound. I have quite a drawl and the only way one could ever mistake me from being anywhere BUT the south is they have never traveled past the Mason Dixon. But, I am probably giving them more credit by assuming they know where the Mason Dixon is located.

    Moving on....next weirdness that is my life. Do people forget how to drive if they have been in a drought situation? I understand that accidents are not called "mean tos". You don't tell someone you "meant to" hit them. You say "I am so sorry! It was an accident". Last Wednesday HAD to be a mean to day. SURELY, there aren't THAT many people that forgot what rain looked like much less forgot how to drive in it. I have to believe that somehow these people had not forgotten as much as they got so excited they could not contain their joy and hold back the foot tapping that goes with said joy. So now that we have the stock ponds full, the feeling of dampness in the air, let's stop praying for rain now.

   I have been trying to think of something insightful or funny to blog about but all the insightful things would be a HIPPA violation to talk about and the funny things are quite embarrassing at times. I can't say there haven't been some giggles here and there lately but some really funny things have been abated for sometime now. I've either grown old and no longer find things very funny or I've grown old and nothing is happening. Maybe mother nature isn't sending funny things my way for fear I might pee my pants! Although, since working at the urology office that isn't as funny as it used to be. ;p

   So, here I am, spent up in the wit department. I look around the room at the people I work with and know God has a sense of humor. I think he laughs every day. How could he not? I wonder if he pokes Jesus in the ribs and says "hahaha hey look! Look at the nose I put on that one!" Or "psst look at THOSE feet! I outdid myself there." Ok, so maybe not THAT but I do think he laughs. Show him your plans and then listen for a laugh. I have just decided to go with the flow. If it happens, it happens and if it doesn't, it doesn't. Now THAT is some philosophy there!

   Speaking of philosophizing, I wonder, does anyone ever get done everything they want to get done? I always have these grand plans like... "I'm going to decorate the house in the cutest way "NEXT" year" but then it doesn't happen. Or maybe, "on my day off I am cleaning this house top to bottom". I don't even get a quarter way to the bottom. My biggest goal is to always have a fire lane through the house and some clean panties. Everything else is up for grabs.  If you are one of those people that always has a clean house, laundry always caught up, the kids taken care of and the oil changed in the car, GET A LIFE! There are things going on in the world that you are missing. Moments going by that you will never get back. Time you can be spending with your parents, your children, or you spouse. There is a hospital that needs volunteers, an elderly person at the nursing home that needs you because they have no family or said family lives out of state, even a child at school that needs you to listen to them read. Your showplace will be there when those things no longer need your attention. Things are just things but experiences will never be forgotten either by you or the person in which you shared those experiences.

   It is Christmas, remember this season isn't about THINGS. It is about spending time together. It is about loving the people around you even if you don't like them very much. It is about being happy to have another year with your family, your friends, your co workers. Next year you may be a friend or two short. Don't waste the opportunity to tell people you love them. Time is fleeting. That may be all some people have and yet but by the grace of God go I.

   Merry Christmas if I don't see you or you don't hear more wonderful words between now and then.....off to go find some fun things to get into.

Happy New Year's 2016

     Here we are into a new year already and we wonder where did the last one go?  If the reader is anything like me they have no clue. I’m pretty sure it was here but I went to sleep and poof, just like that, gone.

     2015 held lots of doctor appointments and too much food. Of course, as a former fatty, anything over 1000 calories is too much food. Since my bariatric surgery I’ve experienced every kind of red flag there could be to stop the madness. I’ve been sick to my stomach after eating. I’ve been nauseated at the thought of food. I’ve even put food in my mouth and thought it multiplied before I could get it chewed up and swallowed. None of these flags were met and challenged. This year I challenge every one of them.

     The fat girl is still inside no matter what size I may be at the beginning of each year. There is always something that she wants and this past year I tried to appease her. But, just like our children, it isn’t always good just to pacify. You have to work and make the problem better. I won’t say fix it but I will say improve on it. No one has to point out the obvious nor does anyone need to be whisper about the “weight gain”. Just like anyone looking at me, I see it too. I have mirrors in my house and unfortunately when you don’t want to see things those mirrors show it to you anyway.

     Before my surgery, Dr Sanborn told me, “surgery is not a fix it, it is a tool to help”. He was and is 100% correct. It fixed nothing. The brain is as fat as ever. For some crazy reason I refused the help this year. Now, I am reaching my hand up once again and pulling myself up. While I’ve never been shy to tell my story sometimes it can get a little personal. If something I say, do, or write about should help ONE woman, then it is worth putting it out there. If something I say, do, or write about makes ONE woman stop and realize she is worth far more than she realizes, it is worth it.

     In 2014 I almost lost my best girlfriend in the whole world and let me tell you if anything should have put me in my place it should have been that. It wasn’t. I comforted with food. I have taken my mother to have chemo once a month for almost the entire year of 2015. One would think I have it all under control, but evidently I am comforting with food. My father was diagnosed with Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s disease. Guess what Daddy’s girl has been doing…. Comforting with food. My husband and I both have worked two jobs all year and it must be stressful because it seems I’ve comforted myself with food. Our marriage almost imploded and I guarantee you I comforted with food. I’ve held hands of my children, of my patients and of my friends while their sorrows pour out and while I was holding it together outwardly, I was comforting with food. None of this, of course, is obvious until I sit and reflect honestly.

     The devil saw a chink in my armor and he weaseled his way back in. He saw I would partake of M&Ms on occasion and all of a sudden the addictive personality in me took over and sugar became an issue. I never cared for chocolate much before surgery. I could always take it or leave it. Sweets weren’t my “thing”. Coca Cola, now that is a different story. Sweet tea became the new red devil in 2015. I haven’t had a coke in 5 years as of December 18 but sweet tea has taken over. Who needs cokes? Addiction is addiction regardless of what form it takes. Sugar is sugar, whether it is cokes, chocolate, bread or the plain ole white stuff you put in your tea.

      So many of us make those New Year’s resolutions and many don’t keep them. This is why I started in December. December is a beginning month for me. I began life in December. My fresh start on life with bariatrics was in December. My last coke was in December and now my sweet tea has taken a hike this December. 2016 is shaping into a work out, lower sugar year. I refuse to say I won’t have any sugar because if and when I do, I don’t need the guilt of “failing”. I am being held accountable daily and prayed for by many. I am going to speak out loud my short term goal today.

       My 2016 goal is work out more, get my heart pumping, stay off the tea and lose 6 pounds before the next Disney trip in February. I’m starting with a little obtainable goal and hoping that by putting it out here it will be an incentive to keep moving forward. This blog after all, is all about the journey, my journey. It isn’t the way anyone else would travel their journey. But, if there is some benefit to the reader then by all means take it and run. You have a kindred spirit right here. I will be more than willing to help, pray, scream or whatever you need to stay on the path you have set for yourself. By helping others, I help myself. Lord knows I need all the help I can get! Happy New Year’s!!!!! Jog through your journey and enjoy every minute.