TADA!!!!
It
is here! My two year surgiversary. Happy surgiversary to me!
It
seems like yesterday in a way, then it seems like forever. But, isn’t that
life? Some things will never change.
You
remember the pain of child birth? Yet you go and have another baby?
Unfortunately, weight loss surgery seems to be a parallel to that for me. The
pain and the vomiting, well, you kind of forget that and start eating stuff you
aren’t supposed to eat.
Bread
is still the enemy. I’ve succeeded in staying away from Panera Bread for the
most part. I have TOTALLY succeeded in staying away from carbonated beverages
(take that Coke!) Cornbread, on the other hand, is like a dessert to me. I love
it. Don’t know why, I love hot, just out of the oven, butter melting cornbread.
But, I digress; cornbread is now officially off the list, off my radar, out of
my life (for now). My hubby is the gatekeeper. He has been such a good
supporter of me and my journey. He went with me to my doctor visit. We
discussed the need for bread control and he is now my conscience for awhile. I
don’t understand my psyche but for some crazy reason he is the ONLY person that
can even HINT that I shouldn’t eat something. Anyone else and I go crazy! I
will eat it in spite of you, me or any other creature that determines to know
best.
My
doctor’s visit went well yesterday. We reviewed my lab work and my habits. I
averaged my monthly weights for the 2012 year and some of you will be happy to
know I gained ONE pound each month of this year. Now, time to stop and
maintain. Old habits are creeping up and
like any monster it is time to stop it in its tracks. The holidays are horrible
for anyone that tries to have self control but those of us former fatties can
tell you it is twice as hard when you are trying to stifle a habit AND count
those calories/carbs.
The
former fatty brain is still a fatty brain. I have come to the conclusion that
ALL former fatties should be in some sort of therapy. After all, we got fat for
a reason and unless someone is treating that reason, you will get fat again! No
questions asked. Being fat is a symptom of an underlying issue. Maybe it is
medical, maybe not... more than likely, in my unprofessional opinion, not. Thankfully,
I have been through enough doctor visits to know my issues and now fully
understand the repercussions of my actions. If anyone reading this is
contemplating weight loss surgery please examine ALL areas of your life and be
COMPLETELY honest with yourself before undergoing such a life changing surgery.
I’m
so proud of all the girls that have had this with me! It is HARD. Some have
really done well….others, well, they have to answer for themselves. It is so
hard for me not to shake some people. I spoke with the doctor about it
yesterday and he tried to put it in perspective for me. I have GOT to let go
and let others worry about themselves. Just because I’m a caregiver doesn’t
mean everyone wants me to care!!
We
all have a journey. Life is that journey. Everyone has to make the decisions
for that journey. You can make decisions for your children and sometimes even
for the members of your family that are incapable due to impairment but
ultimately we are only responsible for ourselves. No one is responsible for us.
We choose the path. Many paths are there. It is ok to go down a path and
realize it isn’t the one you should travel. Everyone gets lost at some point.
Luckily God gave everyone common sense. Sometimes we need to make a conscious
effort to use it! When you lay your head down at night and there is no one in your
head but you, be honest with yourself, look at your path. Is it taking you
where you want to go? No one path is easy. Every path will have hills and
valleys, deserts and floods. Don’t judge the path by its terrain but choose the
path that will be the most rewarding in the end. Go for the one that has the
pot of gold (or streets, in my case) at the end. Reach for the prize! Nothing
worth having is easy to get. (and that my friends is a whole other topic for
another day!)
So
here are the stats…..Total pounds lost=106
Total drop in A1C= 0.7 points and
counting
Total regain for maintenance=18#
Total cost= priceless
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